GOD IS GOOD

God is good. Amen. He is. He loves me even though the mistakes I've made seem unforgivable. I am truly humbled by this. He stands for love, sincerity, joy, truth, peace, and all the good things in the world. I think of how blessed I am to be here, able to spread these amazing traits to other people. It is my life's joy. My heart is rejoycing. I hope you are rejoycing too.

CHANGE

I am single now. I have been for about a month or so. It was hard. For the first time, it was hard but now it isn't anymore. I realized things that I didn't before. I feel better off. It's like I see God at the end of this long road and I won't struggle anymore getting to him. Like my recent relationship was dragging me down. And it was for sure influencing me. I hated how I felt. I was sick. Emotionally and physically. Now I can heal after being through that and I feel that happening. I feel change. My heart is becoming different. I don't ache like I used to or feel burdens that would weigh me down, but now it's a different weight, I feel like I am getting anchored into the word and the truth of Jesus Christ and the Lord our God. I am still fighting but I have broke free from those chains. I sometimes feel pain. I sometimes think that marriage won't be available to me, like I used to. But it is different now, I am really accepting things for what they and will be. My heart is to follow God's will for my life. I want to move the streets. I want to be a Christian, a Christ-like Christian. Someone who loves unconditionally and understands and can help others. I want to fulfill my purpose. I want to live! I want to be happy, and I want to be selfless. I feel like there is so much criticism on my part for the things I have said and the things that I have done. I am ready for my heart not to ache any more or to cry myself to sleep. I want to feel joy and praise God in good and bad. I pray love for the young man whose heart I crushed. I pray that he is blessed beyond belief and that he finds peace where ever he goes. I truly loved him and a part of me still does. He will always be a close friend. But I had to let go. I was being pulled down by waves. I was drowning.....and that is really scary.